Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Some People Should not Have Kids.....says the B at Joann's Fabric!

Some days are better than others....As with any kid, but when you have twins some days are WONDERFUL and some days down right suck!  They feed off each others frustrations and nagging.  Yesterday was one of those days.  I am now clam enough to recant the horridness that was yesterday.
I have decided to take on a new hobby....sewing..... I know it is kinda geeky but hey it's fun and relaxing.  I went to Joann's to look at some stuff and ohhh and ahh at all the things I believe that I can do.  I was walking by the embroidery machines and a lady stopped me and asked me if I wanted to try it out.  I thought why the heck not try the 2000$ machine that I will never buy!  I sat down and typed AABBCC on the computerized screen and watched at amazement as it came out.  During my amazement, out of the corner of my eye, I see Audrey wandering away.......  I sat Addison in the seat at the sewing machine and went to chase Audrey. Of course as always something tragic happens, Audrey falls and scrapes her knee, and is screaming the top of her lungs..... When I catch up to her and try to help her she looks up at me and says, "No Mommy, no hit me!!!!" Are you kidding me I have never hit her!!!! That little actress.  If that was not embarrassing enough Addison, sitting at the sewing machine, has typed in her own letters and pressed the button to start the embroidery.  The letters come out clear as day FUC........... The idiot woman gasps in fear (as if my 2 year old kid knew she typed a dirty) and under her breath says, "Some people should not be able to have kids."
I scooped up my kids and left the store in tears.  In my mind I wish I would have smacked the FUC out of that horrible woman! 

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Drink a Little Drink Smoke a Little Smoke

Why is it no matter how crappy you day is, how sick the kids are, how whiny, how little they eat, or how tired you  are of singing freaking Old McDonald the last five minutes of the day are AMAZING!  Crawling into bed to cuddle my kiddos, say our prayers, and giving night night kisses is the best feeling in the world.  Do not get me wrong I love my alone time at night where I can watch my trash shows and hang out with Adam but I almost don't want them to go to bed. 
It is the really small things in life that mean the most. The mundane every day things that really add up to something special.  Audrey does not like change and is afraid of absolutely everything.  She woke up the other night scream saying that she was scared.  I asked her why and she said Jesus in here Mommy I scared! Even getting a blade of grass on her feet, an ant getting to close, or her napkin too dirty sends her into panic mode but, today, Audrey went down the big slide at McDonalds all by herself.  I was beaming with pride!  My little girl who is scared of EVERYTHING went down the BIG slide!!!!!  How cool is that??!?!?!?!! Small things like after the girls bath I cut their bangs!  My kids, my kids my little bald babies actually had enough hair to cut.  They were bald for almost two years and I cut their bangs!  Every step of the way, every little thing, I beam with pride! 
In Elementary my favorite thing was going to the lake with my Dad.  We lived up the Canyon (less than a mile) from the boat dock.  Sometimes my Dad would come home from work on a Tuesday and randomly hook up the boat, come and get us, and takes us out.  Sometimes we would ski, sometimes we would fish, and sometimes we would just ride but it was the BEST thing in the world! As I got older and moved away to PAMPA freakin Texas I enjoyed going shopping and hanging out with my friends.  College I loved going out at night and dancing (hence the title of this post).  Teaching it was the way I felt as my head hit the pillow and i had the satisfaction of knowing that I had taught a kid something!  Now, it is the way I feel when my little buggers accomplish something new and exciting. 
Kids really do become the center of your universe. The reason you get up at 2, 3, 4 in the morning because of feedings or nightmares.  The reason that it takes 45 minutes to go to Walgreen's instead of the normal 10 min trip because you have to get the kids ready, buckle them in, and then deal with them in the store.  It is the reason God put me here on this earth to raise my beautiful, amazing girls. 

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Sookies a Fairy and I'm Still Watching This???

I, for some unknown reason, LOVE True Blood....  It is the most ridiculous and unrealistic pile of poo on TV.  But.....nonetheless I love it.  I have found a little something in common with each of them which makes it all the more fun.
Sookie Stackhouse:  The hopeless romantic!  Sookie falls head over hills for whomever she's dating but tries to pretend that she does not put up with their shit.  I am the same way with Adam head over heels but with a crazy hard exterior that will PRETEND to not put up with anything! It is so hard not to give into someone you are madly in love with!
Eric:  HOT HOT HOT I am just that good looking!  HAHAHA just kidding.  Eric will say one thing and do it BUT he will do it his own way!!!  I will totally agree to do one thing, do it, but in my own way.  I have done this since I was a kid.  I would tell my Mom that I would clean my room and clean it but I would stuff half the junk under my bed or in my closet. It was visibly clean right!!!!
Jason Stackhouse: An idiot!  I will believe anything that I am told no matter how bazaar.  I feel kinda stupid when people tell me it is a joke or not true because I believe it whole heatedly.  I remember being told that if you fart under the covers and then smell it that you will get carbon monoxide poisoning and I would lose brain cells and eventually motor control.  Now I was in the 2nd grade but still to this day if I fart in bed I still wonder hummmmm am I slowly dumbing myself down with each stinky blow????!!!!  
Well the show is getting good Sookie, Eric, and Bill are going to fight the witches that can make them walk in the daylight sweet!Laterz!

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Knife to the Eye!

I hate, hate, hate, and even despise the mundane day to day house work!!!  Find me a woman who loves to clean nonstop, pick up toys all day long, and scrub the soap scum out of the shower and I WILL give her my life savings to teach me how to like it.  Wait, nevermind my mother-in-law LOVES all of the above. Honestly! HAHAHA!  I think I would really rather be stabbed in the eye than ever having to clean my house again!  Do not get me wrong I have a ridiculously clean house.  I do my job well and I love the end result but every time I pick up the iron to iron Adam's pants or clean the toilet I build up a level of frustration toward my job.  NO matter what I will have to scrub, vacuum, and dust the same stuff next week.  I wonder why I ever bought anything 100% cotton.  I think of my role as more of a drone than a rewarding career as homemaker. Adam has a very successful career and does an amazing job at work.  He also receives the benefits of more projects, praise, and recognition.  I clean the shit stain in the toilet and the reward I get........A clean pot to put more streaks in.  I watch my mother in action and I am in awe of her.  She gets such satisfaction out of cooking and dressing my Dad. It is a true happiness she receives being of service to my Dad and (Alex and I when we were young).  I want to bottle her happiness and shoot it up every time I get out the ironing board.
Speaking of my mother:   
I do not understand how most of our mothers actually did it.  Think about it..... There was no SOAP Network, Facebook, Words with Friends, DVD players, animated toys, MP3 players, and not even DVR's!!!!!  My Mom would probably say the same about her parents generation as well but how how how did she do it!!!  I feel as if I sit on the couch and watch the kids play all day that I can litterally feel my tush grow.  With this said I have come up with some pretty creative ideas to do with the girls and found tons of FREE stuff which is even better but I still find that at the end of the day I have ran a marathon on the tredmill!  There was no point A and B it is all just to keep the kids occupied and happy so they don't kill eachother or drive me to the insane asylum.  I need some good meds I think I am the true definition of ADHD.  Do all stay at home Moms feel this way???  Are we all putting on the smiles?????  Am I the the only one???? 

Thursday, August 11, 2011

My Mommy Stats

I have decided to start a blog not knowing if anyone will read or if I will ever keep track of it either.  I am pretty bad at starting stuff and not finishing it i.e. the laundry that is sitting in the dryer right now calling my name to be folded.  My hope is that it will be an outlet to all my craziness that happens day to day that most stay at home moms can relate to. Most people do not have the fortunate opportunity to stay at home with their kids and see them grow and mold into little people.  I want to help shape and create their lives.  I want them to have rich memories of a childhood where Mommy was there every step of the way.  I want to give my kids all the opportunities and outlets for creativity that I can expose them to during the little time I have them before Kindergarten.  Not everyone is forwarded these opportunities and as of May I was not either but, my husband landed a great job through all of his hard work that would financially provide for this opportunity.

Which brings me to my 1st stat 1:  The number of incomes that are supporting our family.  In some rather dumb ways this is very important to me.  I have always priding myself in the ability to provide.  I want to know that I am worth something and that I can make my own path in this world.  I hold pride in the fact that I obtained my Masters and Undergrad in 4 years.  I did an amazing job providing for my family while my husband was at school (we were also blessed with generous family as well who helped when we needed it).  I know that I have put my paycheck on hold to do something for my kids that nobody else would ever be able to give them but, I feel a little worthless in a sense.  Now I know every stay at home mom would argue that my job is worth more than any other job and that I am the one who makes the home run and function.  Well why it is VERY true the number scares me nonetheless!
2:  This is the biggest number in my life!!!!  2 kids, 2 years old, 2 car seat, 2 eyes that try to watch them at every second, and most importantly for my sanity 2 hour naps!!!!!  My kids are the 2 best things that have ever happened to me without a doubt!  IT IS HARD AND CRAZY but I would never trade these 2 beautiful girls for the world!  The girls in utero developed a rare disorder that usually (80% of the time) ends in mortality.  The girls had twin to twin transfusion syndrome that developed later on in my pregnancy.  We did not know that they had it unfortunately until after they were born.  If I would not have peed my pants at 2 in the morning I would have never gone to the hospital that night and might not have had been induced.  I am so so so so so so so blessed to have both of my kiddos alive and healthy!  I will truly never be able to thank God enough for my girls.  
3 the number of days all my teacher friends have been back at work planning for the new school year and the number of times I have been brought to tears because of the back to school aisle at Target.  That really was my favorite part of the year.  I love the smell of new supplies, unopened and unused notebooks in the traditional 5 colors, and all the points still on the crayons.  Plus it was the only time all year my room was EVER clean!  I miss you guys a lot and who knows what I'll be like when the kids flood the halls next week and I am not there to see it.
Last but not least 4 the number of pounds I have gained since I have stayed at home.  UGGG I stare at my kids eating all day long and all I want to do is join in!!!!  Hopefully this stat will disappear soon!

Well as Dora draws to an end so do I.  In the words of the bilingual annoying little girl and ridiculous talking monkey friend: Thanks for helping ADIOS!